The Family Business People Series
Why Did They Really Leave? How to Conduct a Powerful Exit Interview in Your Family Business
Have you ever been blindsided by a team member quitting? One day everything seems fine and the next, they’re gone.
In family businesses, where relationships run deep and teams are often lean, a sudden resignation can feel personal, painful, and confusing. Especially when it’s one of your A-players.
Exit Interviews: The Tool Most Family Businesses Forget
Most family business owners have a strategy, but it’s stuck in their head.
One of the most overlooked tools for retaining great talent and improving your company culture is the exit interview. It’s a simple concept… a one-on-one conversation with a departing employee, and when done well, it can offer insights that transform your leadership approach.
Unfortunately, many family business owners skip this step. Why? It feels awkward. Emotions run high. And honestly, when someone quits unexpectedly, frustration can easily take over.
But skipping this conversation is one of the biggest mistakes leaders make.
The Power of Understanding Why They Left
Let’s rewind to the “Great Resignation” of 2020–2022. Millions of people quit their jobs in search of better pay, work-life balance, or remote flexibility. And even though things have stabilized, people still leave, often without saying why.
If you don’t take the time to ask, you’ll never know whether they left for something preventable, like poor communication, mismatched expectations, or lack of feedback. And if it’s happening more than once, you may be losing great people without realizing the patterns.
How to Conduct an Effective Exit Interview (Even If It’s Your First One)
You don’t need an HR degree or a scripted questionnaire to do this well. You just need curiosity, humility, and a willingness to listen. Here’s a basic approach:
Set the Tone
Choose a neutral, private space—or even meet over coffee. This conversation isn’t about justifying yourself or defending your decisions. It’s about learning.
Practice Active Listening
Let them speak. Resist the urge to interrupt or explain. Your goal is to hear their full story, not prove them wrong.
Stick to the Facts
If they mention people or situations, ask for specific examples. Avoid getting pulled into vague complaints or gossip.
Keep Emotions in Check
This isn’t personal. If the conversation gets overly heated or unproductive, it’s okay to respectfully wrap it up.
The 3 Best Exit Interview Questions
You don’t need a long list… just three powerful, open-ended prompts can uncover the truth behind their decision to leave:
1. “Tell me about why you decided to accept the new position.”
This reveals what triggered their decision. Was it just money? Or did they feel underappreciated, unclear about expectations, or disrespected? Remember, the first answer is often surface-level, ask follow-ups.
2. “Tell me about your experience working here.”
This helps you spot what’s working and what’s not. Did they feel supported? What did they enjoy or dislike? Pay close attention to any mention of managers, coworkers, or misalignment in expectations.
3. “If you were in my position, what changes would you make?”
This is where innovation meets feedback. A true A-player might offer thoughtful suggestions, while others may only complain. Either way, their answers can give you clarity.
One Final Question to Ask Yourself
At the end of every exit interview, ask yourself:
“Knowing what I know now, would I rehire this person?”
If the answer is yes, keep the door open.
Many people who left during the Great Resignation later regretted their decisions. By parting on good terms, you leave room for them to return or even refer future talent to your company.
Don’t Let Turnover Catch You Off Guard
Every family business faces turnover, but how you respond makes all the difference. Exit interviews aren’t just for closure, they’re for growth.
Want to hear this episode in full?
Listen to “Mastering Exit Interviews” on the Family Business Breakthroughs podcast
Listen to “Mastering Exit Interviews” on the Family Business Breakthroughs podcast
Ready for more strategies to grow your business, develop your next leader, and strengthen your team? Visit askmeridian.com and be sure subscribe to the podcast for more family business breakthroughs.
